The Pesto Manifesto

In which the tome that deals with the First Challenge of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is revealed. The scribe of the book was Pesto, a midget created by the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The Pesto Manifesto, as it came to be known, was created by His Noodliness to aid in the battle of His First Challenge, as predicted by the omniscient Holy Monster.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Verse 319

On the Chianti Conception:

And the Flying Spaghetti Monster did hit the town, and lo did He consume copious quantities of Chianti of dubious quality. And, with his Holy Omniscient vision clouded by the spoon-cleaning nectar, he espied Mary on the dancefloor, and he thought unto Himself, "That looks like a bit of alright".

And the next morning the Flying Spaghetti Monster awoke, feeling as if his meatballs had been baked in the sun, and rolleth over did he, and again he espied Mary. "Bugger" thought His Noodliness, and "The alright was alwrong" did he think, and commenced to chew off the noodles that were trapped beneath the sleeping Mary. And he did flee least Mary awake, saying "Arrrr".

After the passing of nine moons, a lawyer did cometh forth, saying to the Flying Spaghetti Monster, "We will need a small sample of your most Holy sauce, for a test to be performed". And the Flying Spaghetti Monster did fly into a rage, and threatened to cast the lawyer into the Boiling Void. But after a time he did calmeth down, and said unto the lawyer, "It's a fair cop".

And that is how the Flying Spaghetti Monster did bring forth a son, who was known as Jesus.


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